new year's resolutions.

I never used to make New Years' resolutions. I was one of those people who always proclaimed them as stupid, cliche, and things that you said only because everyone else was. Most people forgot about them by February, anyway, I used to reason. As I got older, I started to see them more like guidelines - things that you could post on Facebook if you really wanted to, but if you ended up failing at.. well, they didn't really count, did they? By the time I was a working professional, I stopped thinking about them at all.

This year, I'm seeing things differently. By definition, a resolution is "a firm decision to do or not to do something," "the action of solving a problem, or contentious matter," according to the dictionary. It's something you do, on your own, to rectify something you've been having difficulty with or anticipate having difficulty with in the future. Simply put, it's a promise to yourself. It doesn't have anything to do with a public post on Facebook or making surface-level commitments just to join the fad. So I thought about what I have been really struggling with and want to change in the new year, and this is what I came up with - my resolutions:

reading this past year.

One of my earliest memories is of my dad and I, sitting with me on his lap in his black velvet recliner chair - the same chair that just a few years later I would fall into and acquire a dent in my skull that I still have - reading a big book together, sounding out the words for what felt like hours. They weren’t dreadful hours, though, as that phrase can often mean. They were joyful hours, and continued to be joyful hours throughout my young life into my adolescence and into my adulthood. 

In first grade, I won an award for reading fifty books at home on my own and the prize was a red wagon full of brand new, beautifully illustrated hardcover books. My mom came to the classroom for the presentation, the principal came down to the classroom, and a photo ran in the district newspaper. When they announced the competition, it was the first time I could remember truly wanting something and feeling that fire burning in my gut. I was determined to win and when I did, I was so proud and excited - not just to win, but to win books. 

book review: behind closed doors.

I love to read. I don't remember a time in my life that I wasn't reading. My earliest memory involving books is when I was four, laying in the armchair with my dad, having him read book after book to me and sounding out the words with him. I knew how to read way before I started kindergarten, and reading has always been an escape for me. There is nothing quite like diving into the world of someone else to distract yourself, or to make you feel wonderful feelings of joy and anguish along with the characters while you're simply lying in your bed or couch. Learning about things I never would have had the chance to know about otherwise, enriching my life with knowledge about all sorts of subjects, and experiencing worlds completely different from my own, are privileges that reading has afforded me and I am so grateful for.

I am often reading more than one book at a time - usually a fiction book, a medical book, and some sort of memoir or other nonfiction book. Which book I pick up at any given time depends on which mood I'm in, but when I find a book that really sucks me in, I will read that exclusively until I'm finished. I love finding those gems and those are the ones I like to rave about to other people.

So naturally, I thought it would be a great idea to share those books that I have read recently and loved with you. First up is Behind Closed Doors by B.A. Paris, an intense thriller that had me riveted from page one.